When the reliving is more painful than the living

Thinking today about “grace and grounding” (which Brené Brown said in her podcast with Sonya Renee Taylor) as a way forward today. A way to see / notice / note the past, like: that I stayed up too late last night, that I didn’t have a good run, that I ate a little more sugar and a little less protein (an old habit, a way of eating I trained into myself), and that I was unable to get off my phone when my eyes were tired and my mind wanted to stop.

I replay this last one over and over again in my head.

But with grace (this is the key, and also very difficult), I can notice this: the reliving in my head right now is so much more painful than the living itself, which happened but then ended when I went to bed. And then I can re-ground myself in the present: right here, in a cafe on the west end of Pearl Street. What is this matcha tasting like, look at the woman carrying her tea so slowly.

I can stop moving my beautiful mindspace back there / last night / back on my bed / in my phone-tired eyes. I can hold it / tug it back here / to this cafe, this morning, how my hands move as I type.

Look up and be / see / notice here now.

Prompts / Thoughts:

Tell me about your mindspace.

How do you bring yourself back?

What are your thoughts on grace?